i've done it. twice. in my 9305 days living on earth, i only did it twice. as in two times. and i am gonna tell you how i did it the first time. my first one was out of curiousity - how does it feel? the rush. the emotions. i need to know. i need to find out. and then there's this constant peer pressure. its like everyone did it. i was left behind. i should try. i just need to, i can't see any logic why - it's just that i had to. i think its the inner demon in me. it's so wrong on so many levels, i knew it. but heck, teenage ADHDed hormones lead to a lot of wrong decisions. being in college sucks. you need to be 'in'. this is one of those 'in' moments. so i decided to do it.
so here it comes. we were in the room, it was on the second floor. with adults on the living room watching tv and all, we need to minimize our voices or else, cops and firemen would had them alarmed. they wont understand. we were still young. so we need to be very discreet. "i am 18 (or so) already and so i am allowed to do this", i was kept telling to myself, to ease away the guilt. i had been a good person in my entire life.. for once, i wanted to do crazy things. then i sat on the bed, that's the only furniture in the 5x6-meter-room (gisukod nakog dangaw) that can hold my butt aside from the dusty wooden floor. i let a loud sigh escaped from my throat as i dismounted my bag from my shoulder to the floor, then i remembered, my literature paperworks that needs to be pass the next day, let alone the reporting on one of my IT majors. ugh! i hated it. the reporting with the visual aids and the talking in front. then i looked at my worn uniform, i needed to change, it smelled funny already. i grabbed a t-shirt from my bag. yeah, i brought one, i planned this event. then after all the hiss and with a new clothes on, i readied myself. there's no turning back.
then i heard footsteps outside the room and came a pair of feet on the door, i looked at the intruder and smiled nervously. "let's start", i said with a buckle on my voice. i haven't done this before. what if i couldn't handle this. amongst us in that room, i was the neophyte. "i'm ready, bring it on!" i said in a firmed voice. "okay! kinsa man ang unang TAGAY?", that was izha, on the door, holding a pitcher of liquor (tanduay white man kuno to). so this is it! my initiation in the world of drunkards. then came marjorie from her behind with a knowing smile. mga palahubog kayu ni sila. so to speak. gulp here and gulp there, 'til my head felt light. then i smoothed the inside of the pitcher til the last drop.
an hour later, as the three of us were lying on the bed, i watched the ceiling as it moved in circle, of course it was just my sotted brain who did the tricks. or i don't know - maybe the whole world did spin at that time. then came the hurling. four, five times, i lost count how many times i throwup. right then, i believed in hell, coz i experienced it at that moment. then i felt the urge to cry coz my tear ducts overflowed. "maybe because of all the liquid i consumed", i thought (of course when your high and all, your brain becomes foggy). then my kidney decided to work overtime, i needed to pee. of course, it's me who'll seek a bathroom which i preferred the other way desperately at that time. or maybe a wet bed is not that awful. but marj and izha would strungle me to death if we wake up the next day swimming in a pool of my urine. IF i wake up, coz i was pretty damn sure that i was on my deathbed, already. then i struggled to stand up and the floor begins to wobble, "did i just jump on the boat earlier and forgot about it?", coz it feels like i was floating on the sea with a strong wave constantly swayed me in no direction. of course its just my alcohol driven brain who do the work. "slippers, i need to wear slippers". i looked at my feet and try to distinguish which foot is left and which is right. i smirk when i wore the pair of slippers correctly, "i did it! mama would be proud".
then i went outside the room to the stair, the bathroom was in the ground floor so i need to descent - which was a grueling task. "who the hell is the architect of this house??? why didn't he put the bathroom next to the bed?" that would be easier. then i planned well my next move, i don't have plans of stumbling all they way down and harmed my perfect set of teeth. so there, i maneuvered each steps carefully. when i reached the ground floor, i almost gave myself a congratulatory speech for a job well done.
the next day, i woke up with a headache, it feels like my brain will cut into pieces every time i move. i had wish i could be dead. - so there. that was my first time. and i never did it again 'til i was 23. that was my last up to date.
so here it comes. we were in the room, it was on the second floor. with adults on the living room watching tv and all, we need to minimize our voices or else, cops and firemen would had them alarmed. they wont understand. we were still young. so we need to be very discreet. "i am 18 (or so) already and so i am allowed to do this", i was kept telling to myself, to ease away the guilt. i had been a good person in my entire life.. for once, i wanted to do crazy things. then i sat on the bed, that's the only furniture in the 5x6-meter-room (gisukod nakog dangaw) that can hold my butt aside from the dusty wooden floor. i let a loud sigh escaped from my throat as i dismounted my bag from my shoulder to the floor, then i remembered, my literature paperworks that needs to be pass the next day, let alone the reporting on one of my IT majors. ugh! i hated it. the reporting with the visual aids and the talking in front. then i looked at my worn uniform, i needed to change, it smelled funny already. i grabbed a t-shirt from my bag. yeah, i brought one, i planned this event. then after all the hiss and with a new clothes on, i readied myself. there's no turning back.
then i heard footsteps outside the room and came a pair of feet on the door, i looked at the intruder and smiled nervously. "let's start", i said with a buckle on my voice. i haven't done this before. what if i couldn't handle this. amongst us in that room, i was the neophyte. "i'm ready, bring it on!" i said in a firmed voice. "okay! kinsa man ang unang TAGAY?", that was izha, on the door, holding a pitcher of liquor (tanduay white man kuno to). so this is it! my initiation in the world of drunkards. then came marjorie from her behind with a knowing smile. mga palahubog kayu ni sila. so to speak. gulp here and gulp there, 'til my head felt light. then i smoothed the inside of the pitcher til the last drop.
an hour later, as the three of us were lying on the bed, i watched the ceiling as it moved in circle, of course it was just my sotted brain who did the tricks. or i don't know - maybe the whole world did spin at that time. then came the hurling. four, five times, i lost count how many times i throwup. right then, i believed in hell, coz i experienced it at that moment. then i felt the urge to cry coz my tear ducts overflowed. "maybe because of all the liquid i consumed", i thought (of course when your high and all, your brain becomes foggy). then my kidney decided to work overtime, i needed to pee. of course, it's me who'll seek a bathroom which i preferred the other way desperately at that time. or maybe a wet bed is not that awful. but marj and izha would strungle me to death if we wake up the next day swimming in a pool of my urine. IF i wake up, coz i was pretty damn sure that i was on my deathbed, already. then i struggled to stand up and the floor begins to wobble, "did i just jump on the boat earlier and forgot about it?", coz it feels like i was floating on the sea with a strong wave constantly swayed me in no direction. of course its just my alcohol driven brain who do the work. "slippers, i need to wear slippers". i looked at my feet and try to distinguish which foot is left and which is right. i smirk when i wore the pair of slippers correctly, "i did it! mama would be proud".
then i went outside the room to the stair, the bathroom was in the ground floor so i need to descent - which was a grueling task. "who the hell is the architect of this house??? why didn't he put the bathroom next to the bed?" that would be easier. then i planned well my next move, i don't have plans of stumbling all they way down and harmed my perfect set of teeth. so there, i maneuvered each steps carefully. when i reached the ground floor, i almost gave myself a congratulatory speech for a job well done.
the next day, i woke up with a headache, it feels like my brain will cut into pieces every time i move. i had wish i could be dead. - so there. that was my first time. and i never did it again 'til i was 23. that was my last up to date.
PS: sa mga hugaw og utok, kabaw ko unsa inyung gi-think.. wahahahaha. and for the record, whoever said that you'll forgot everything when you're drunk is a liar.
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